Lost Coin Notes – April 27, 2010

Doen heard from the students that the directions to be more being specific in our groups was useful – it is better to speak personally than in generalities. That is now a new ground rule. It is OK to remind folks in your group if they are being too abstract. 

No Mind, excellence, remembering aims and overcoming limitations were to be used in last week’s discussions. A student asked for some guidance in their incorporation. Doen suggested that if you are going to tell the story – put yourself in the story. Not like seeing it on TV – but make it real for your situation – how you are feeling about it, what are your fears? Jukai is a ceremony – but making it real is something else. You are the one who makes the practice/your relationship/your work alive. Another student offered that speaking it, helped them understand how they really felt about a situation. In small groups, you either: 1) are like a observer – focused on fixing others (don’t do that – rather find parallels to your own situation, bond); or,  2) don’t come forward (think only what you are saying). You need a balance – don’t fall into either teacher or student role. Who is going to make it real, if not you?

Doen read an interesting book this week – Bounce. The book is saying that talent is not a factor in excellence. (One reservation – we tend to not take up things we have absolutely no talent for – why take up music if you are tone-deaf.) 10,000 hours will make anyone expert in the field (20 hours/week for 10 years).  One researcher raised his daughters to be chess champions – the experiment succeeded. Tiger Woods held his first golf ball at two – he has put in a lot of time. The other thing he said – not only do you need to practice for 10,000 hours but you need to try hard – not mechanical practice. For example, you must push yourself each day. The message: in your practices (zazen, small groups, work with other people and observing yourself), if you don’t push the edge it won’t matter. But not in a punishing way – don’t call yourself a jerk. Even when trying harder, go with the flow – you want nature at your back. There is no conflict doing zazen with more concentration AND flowing. Everyone has a need to be a victim. If it is everyone else’s fault – how can you fix it?  You are to blame – time to grow-up – don’t be a victim, take full responsibility. The most precious thing to Doen is to take your practice to the point of seeing who you are. But only you can do it.  Doen would love it if you went to San Francisco and sat everyday for a month.  Doen would come for interview every day.  Practice at the edge of your practice whatever the next step is for you. The more Doen can see how you do things – that will help. Daido trained Doen on how to do things not just how to think, because he volunteered to be CEO. Do it with gusto. The only thing we apply gusto to in this culture is beer. 


Student’s Response to the question of what they are noticing these days:
Student #1: He has stopped worrying about what people think about what he says.
Doen:  Realize others really don’t care, even if you said something stupid. They would not judge you on just that one comment. They likely have already formed an opinion about your intelligence.
Student #2: Even with a wonderful new job, they are watching for old patterns to come up – but they are still enjoying a new start. 
Student #3: They have had long stretches with easy sitting, now they are in a more difficult stretch – training for August so they can get a lot out of it. 
Doen: You don’t have to have a good time sitting – just do it and do it better all of the time – more focus, concentration, more forgetting yourself. Over a period of time it will get more enjoyable. 
Student #4: Improvement works a lot better when you are not negatively judging yourself. 
Doen: Don’t negatively judge yourself or Doen. When Doen corrects he is not mad at you – if it feels that way let him know. 
Student #5: After having children, life is her practice vs. sitting, etc.
Doen:  You need to schedule sitting – just like exercise. 
Student #6: With self-observation – she mostly watches what is wrong.
Doen: Self-observation is just watching, not critical.  There is a difference between watching what you are doing and thinking about it. It can take a while to get used to. If you are thinking you can be self-critical, but if you are just watching, you don’t need to think. It just happens by itself, it is a field of concentration – a kind of seeing – like zazen or vipassana (observational/meditative). If you find yourself being critical, you aren’t doing it quite right. You need to be observing in real time. At first if we just watch, we feel like we might do something stupid. No mind – actually means with great presence of mind.  It can take time to cultivate. Self-criticism will be the greatest obstacle. Self-observation is like a field of awareness that doesn’t have content or thought. 
Student #7: they are in transition and are doing what they really want to do for the first time – but they feel guilty they are letting others down. 
Doen: Keep things in perspective, if they had brain tumor would they be worrying about this? Set yourself free. 
Student #8: Life is going well, but they are afraid of pushing it any farther.  It seems like sitting takes a lot of concentration – energy. 
Doen: Don’t back away just keep trying.
Student #9: They were inspired by a friend who didn’t over-react to a difficult situation.
Doen: We don’t have to be victims.
Student #10: They saw themselves going into despair, being puny, due to another’s actions.
Doen: You are a victim if you don’t communicate your concerns. You have a right to have your life go in the direction you want, regardless of others think - especially if it isn’t what you want. Don’t take the position that you have to be miserable and don’t have any control.      
Student #11: They have become less afraid of working with details – gives them more confidence that they can do it. 
Student #12: They have a lot of difficult external circumstances, but are still having fun. 
Student #13: The edge they have been working on is sitting. Now they are sitting regularly but still lack the intensity when on the zafu.
Doen: It is very important to take that first step of regular sitting. If you push yourself, you will find you enjoy sitting more.
Student #14: A story about taking one step at a time kept coming back to them. Lots of things are going really well, but they don’t always recognize it. 

A broker dies and goes to heaven. He gets good treatment. A Priest goes up and gets OK treatment and he complains. St. Peter says, up here we work on results. You have been preaching for thirty years and no one prays. He sold stock for 30 years and made people pray like crazy.     
You have choice everyday – do you want to feel good or bad? The whole basis of practice is to not be a victim – you are responsible. Don’t fall into that – help each other with that – help others do what they want - we have plenty of victims.  